What does it mean to thrive versus just survive? To thrive is defined as” to grow or develop well or vigorously.” To survive is “to live or exist, especially in spite of hardship.” There are experiences in our lives to survive and times to thrive. How can one create an environment that helps insure thriving as often as possible?
According to Abraham Hicks and the Law of Attraction ,” what we focus on expands”. This makes sense. Have you ever noticed when you become focused on buying a certain type of car, for example a Prius, you see Prius’ everywhere.
We hold a lot of power in choosing what we focus on. I love the Shakespeare quote “ Nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” Our thoughts play a huge role in how we feel and what we experience. What thoughts give energy and what thoughts are draining? For example, judgmental thinking can be draining. Often when we are caught up in judging others, we are also stuck in worrying about how others might judge us. Judging is often tied to looking for what is WRONG with others and ourselves. How much more positive energy would flow into our lives if we started looking for and focusing on all the things that are RIGHT about ourselves and others.
Despite efforts to see the best in others, there may still exist those people that challenge us. If it is at all possible to release annoyances and see a bigger picture, that is a way to minimize the effect the negative person has on us. If you find yourself fixating on the unpleasant situation it may help to start the inner exploration of what could this person showing up in our lives possibly teach us. Sometimes the most difficult people teach us the most. If we can utilize our challenges as opportunities for growth we will indeed thrive. A great question to ask oneself about the annoying person in your life is :”What do they have, do, or be that I am not allowing myself to have, do or be..?” Often the person we judge the hardest is an exaggerated mirror of something we are not giving ourselves permission to have, do or be. I like to think of it as the cosmic mirror.
Some times difficult people are just DIFFICULT.. A great question to ask in this situation is “what action do I need to take? Is there a conversation to be had, a move to be made or a boundary to set?” Thinking about the changes that are possible rather then focusing on the things and people we cannot control is more empowering.
Worrying about what others think about you is also generally draining. . How can we be authentic and embrace our true self while being overly concerned with other people’s judgments? There will always be judgments. Remembering that what other people think about you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them is important. Don Miguel Ruiz puts it succinctly “What other people think of you is none of your business.”, in his book “The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom.” Two different people will think two opposite things about the same subject because of who they are and how they see the world. Judgment is not objective. It is best to let other people have their opinion and let it be just that, THEIR opinion. It is important to not get off course by overly concerning yourself with other people’s business. Stay focused on your own growth and you will thrive. Sometimes we are our own worst critic. Try for one day to focus on all things that are great about you and your life and notice how differently you feel. Start a gratitude journal. It is proven to increase happiness.
There are many ways to thrive. If you need help releasing something or taking action in your life hypnotherapy and coaching are very effective in enabling those shifts. As always I am hear if you have any questions about the power of hypnotherapy or coaching.
What makes you feel lighter? Is it when there is no resistance? Is it a feeling of being connected to a bigger picture or having a sense of humor? Maybe it is a state of being. For me I feel lightest when I am inspired and in the flow. I experience the opposite when I am coming at a situation from an “I should.” That feels heavy and weighted.
The monkey mind readily provides a litany of “shoulds.” This ego mind, with it’s relentless desire to protect it’s sense of identity, often comes from a place of worry, fear, comparison, or guilt and it lacks lightness. If I am feeling heavy, I tune in to see if there is a “should” running the show. I ask myself where the “should” is coming from and if it is actually true.
I have found that if I try and subvert what is in my heart, in service of a “should”, I will not experience lightness. I trust my feelings and look for the important information in them. Whenever possible I gravitate to that which feels lighter. With things I do not choose, I look for an approach that invites lightness.
Fora simple example, doing the dishes is not my favorite thing. However I do like a clean house. This conflict led me to ask myself is there a way I could enjoy this? The idea of listening to music and seeing it as a mindfulness practice came to me. From this approach I now have a lot less resistance to doing the dishes and it feels lighter.
Checking in to whether something feels heavy or light is a great way of discovering what is true for you. Hypnosis helps you get in touch with your sensations, heart’s desire and deeper knowing. As always I would love to assist you on your journey toward more ease and lightness.
Here is something you can try on your own. Next time you find yourself feeling really excited or happy, make a mental note about how it feels in your body. Experiment with what kind of thoughts, actions and beliefs recreate that felt sense. When you are feeling out of sync, weighed down, or tense, take a few steps back and ask; What changes (small or large) would invite more lightness? Is there a “should” to release or a new approach to take?
With Love, Denise
It brings me such joy to witness and guide clients in their pursuit of self improvement. This has been a great year so far, with many great breakthroughs to celebrate. One of my clients has lost 40 pounds and feels better then she can ever remember. “I could not of done it without your help Denise”, is what she said the last time I saw her. She looked like a different person, and not just because of her weight loss. She shed a lot more then just weight with hypnotherapy. By uncovering and releasing the negative emotional triggers that were keeping her stuck, her spirit lightened up and eating healthy and exercise came with great ease. The pounds are naturally falling off and now her subconscious mind is supporting her, rather then sabotaging her goals.
Last week I caught up with a client whose transformation is truly an inspiration. When I first started coaching her she was in a dead end job and ending a bad relationship. She was overwhelmed with self doubt and fear and did not know how to pick up the pieces. Her confidence was so low she could not imagine applying for a new job or going on any dates as she feared rejection so deeply. Through the process of hypnosis and coaching her image and belief in herself started to change and taking risks did not seem so scary. Today she has a new job and a a new partner. Her relationship to herself is the real testament to her breakthrough. She knows how to speak up for herself, set healthy boundaries and validate herself and the positive changes just keep unfolding.
This week I am helping a pack a day smoker quit after 30 years of smoking. She is down to 5 cigarettes a day and is committed to becoming smoke-free. Already she can notice the difference in her breathing and is saving money and her health by releasing this destructive habit.
Do you have a change that you’re wanting to make? At Breakthrough Hypnosis and Coaching you will step into your power and experience how the support of hypnosis and coaching accelerates your transformation. Here is to more freedom and positive changes!
With Love, Denise
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